.Character.

Never have I read as much as I have during my time in Seattle.  I must thank the Metro transportation system that chauffers me to work daily, alloting me time to immerse myself in a good book or "silence" of my thoughts.  These days, my choices are bound to architectural exam notes or Leviticus...and I don't think Numbers will be anymore exhilarating.  So, I reflect back to one of the readings I've been meaning to share.

One of the books I chose to engage in was the biography of Charles Schulz, Peanuts cartoonist.  My previous posts about character development while waitin on God reminded me of the part the author shared about Schulz's father, Carl.  His father was a barber, and his business evolved around a list of precepts that Schulz would later manifest in his own career. 

1. Maintain a good posture
2. Wear an easy cheerful countenance
3. Constantly practice friendliness
4. Speak distinctly
5. Don't be overly inclined to give advice
6. Don't be a didactic
7. Be a good listener.  A good listener asks leading questions
8. Be essentially informal
9. One's success in any avenue of life depends a great deal upon his selling ability
10. Don't take yourself too seriously.

Besides the fact that Lucy was the personification of his first wife and the surprising secret of the real Charlie Brown, these precepts were what I took away from this biography.  I reflect back to them from time to time and make it a point to practice a few on any given day. 

I am learning so much through my growth in this career, but the information is a bit of an overload.  I am challenged and stretched daily.  Mixing in a few of these goals seem to make the day a bit more manageable.

My hope is that you find encouragement and a challenge to practice, too. :)

Church

I’ve come to cherish my Saturday mornings.  My day begins waking up to a snooze-less morning,  brewing myself a hot cup of coffee, snuggling back into the sofa, and looking forward to a morning of TV.  Ah, yes Lord, this is how I choose to spend my morning Sabbath – I will catch up on chores after catchin up on "The Soup", "New Girl", "E! News", the "Kardashians" - I have until noon, maybe 1pm. Hope that’s all-right cuz I’ve been doing that for the past 7 years. 
 

Whitney Houston’s funeral service appeared as I clicked the remote.   I first knew of a diva showdown when I heard Prince of Egypt's, “There can be Miracles”.   My allegiance was to Mariah.  Nevertheless, I am a sucker for celebrity gossip and coverage, so the channel stayed on the service.  Little did I expect to be weeping into my coffee.   I said it once, but I gotta say it again – Black people know how to do CHURCH!                

I don’t remember the exact words, but I was reminded of the time a friend told me how they felt more blessed at funerals than they did at weddings.    It’s not a new concept that funerals bring to your very attention what you always knew: your time here is finite.  I guess we need the reminders once in a while.  So, I guess I considered Whitney’s service as my attendance at a funeral.

Reverend Donny McClurklan sang a song, “Stand”.  I felt the pain in his voice as he sang, “you pray, you cry, pray, cry…after you’ve done all you can do…you just stand; The Lord will pull you through”.   I may not deal with the fame and depression that may come with her life, but I connected with the lyrics.  It was nice to have a song embrace the reality and struggle that is our earthly life.  Whoo~ take me to church, Donny!

Tyler Perry remembered two constants through his encounters with Whitney: grace and her love for the Lord.  Kevin Costner remembered their common bond of church upbringing.  Bebe Winans remembered her craziness and giving heart.  All these wonderful qualities in a woman whom we come to know as the drug-abusing, spoiled celebrity poster-child for “Crack is Whack” – but MAN, could she sing.

Few thoughts ran through my head as each musical guest and celebrity paid their impressive respects and anecdotes of their time with her and how much of an impact she had on their lives. 

1.  As much as I do want to be remembered for my fame and beauty - soon, my friends…soon – I want God’s presence to be vividly remembered in my life.  I want to be remembered that I had a relationship with my Father in the midst of my tears, struggles, growths, and joys.  God was in my life the whole time.  I laughed and cried with Him.  I tried to understand life with Him.
2. Funerals remind me that I should say what it is that gets stirred up in my heart.  Whether it be a rebuke/praise, don’t hold it in.  Be truthful.  Let the pride go.  That counts for faith too, it’s never too late. 
3. Embrace the struggle.  Life is about pain and crying as well as the joys and fun.
4. "The mob is fickle" (Lucilla, Gladiator)  I worry all the time of what others think of me, but I am reminded of how fickle we can be as critics.  Dependency and validity through the eyes of others is not worth the effort.
5. Don't box yourself into what you know to be "church".  I don't know if Whitney is in heaven or not.  I don't know if Michael went, but they might have.  I have my own convictions, but I gotta say, I don't know.  I know we limit ourselves, and may dig ourselves a hole if we only depend on the "what it should look like"s of Christianity.

I know this contradicts #2, but I most likely won’t get all “Hallelujer” up at church.  My Korean Presbyterian background will keep me at the mild clapping and subtle hand raisin’ at best.  But I was pleasantly surprised and blessed to have had “church” witnessing this woman’s funeral service – convictions, re-evaluations, and all. 

.Clear Eyes, Full Hearts.

“People who grow in self-pity never grow strong in character.”

Father Fiction – Donald Miller

In my moment of reprieve from work/testing schedule, I decided to make this journal entry a little more upbeat.  I remember one of my commitments upon moving to Seattle was to integrate positive thoughts and mantras into my daily complaints and rants.  If you experienced my cheerful, “Today is a New Day” chants, you’ve witnessed my practice.  I most-likely hated that day.  

I have a personal journal I write in occasionally – mostly when I really need to speak with God.  I’m not a fan of public prayer.  I never was.  Writing is my outlet and means to clearly let myself and God know how I am feeling.  The majority of my personal journal reflects my wrestle with God and a healing from brokenness within the 4 years I’ve been in Seattle.  He’s my God, and I think it anyway – it’s ok to write it down.  God’s my homey.

I remember my decision to document this one particular moment of positivity in my life.  I have experienced many moments of happiness and joy in my time here, but I tend to celebrate with a great dinner (accompanied with my drink of choice, of course) and sharing the moment with my friends.  These memories get harder to dig up when I am living the daily life. 

Greenlake is one of God’s gifts in my life.  I’ve looped it many times, reciting my “Psalms” prayers with every run.  I particularly remember and recorded a run on a Tuesday afternoon.  Most projects I was involved in took me through design, but this was my first that I was able to carry through to construction.    This was new territory, and I was challenged to see this through somewhat without my hands being held.  In retrospect, I appreciate that I was put through this, and I am proud of the outcome.

I remember ending my run, looking back to the Space Needle in the distance, a foreground of calm water, and a backdrop of autumn leaves and sunset-painted sky.  God embraced me that day with natural beauty, and an extended moment of peace and contentment.  I experienced worship that only I will understand with my Father.  He grants me this moment, when 90% of the time I decide to curse His provision for my life because everyone else I know is moving ‘on track’ with their lives.  What a merciful God!  I am un-deserving.  I am blessed. 

It’s easy to get lost in the complaints of the day.  I’m glad I decided to include this entry into my personal rants.  I fell into mind frame of self-pity while studying for my exam.  I am not justifying my feelings, but simply state that it’s a feeling, and I felt it.  Bringing my Greenlake memory to my attention helps me to gain composure and understanding to persevere. 

Acknowledge your feelings, but also ground yourself in the moments of peace and joy.

Make it a point to document your moments. Coach Taylor would be proud of you. J

Every man at some point in his life is going to lose a battle. He is going to fight and he is going to lose. But what makes him a man is at the midst of that battle he does not lose himself. This game is not over, this battle is not over.  _Coach Eric Taylor, Friday Night Lights

Clear Eyes, Full Hearts.

.Study Jams.

I have not forgotten this blog, but do not have anything but contracts, insurance, and bonds in my head.
I am taking exam 1/7 for my architectural license on Monday, so please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.  I need focus and the brain to soak in this information, get it, and be a contractual GENIUS by Monday.

Perk to studying - exposure to great music

Love them :
Gungor - "Beautiful Things"

Looking forward to writing next week.

.ttfn.